Reading with Dry Eyes

The book with my marker & used Bible on top of my laptop

I am currently reading the book When God Writes Your Love Story and I'm already halfway through it. It was lent to me by Shy, kasama ko sa Yuppies. I've started reading it 2 weeks ago before I fall asleep and I was actually not making much progress with that--Ive just moved to about 3-5 pages. So This morning, when I woke up early, I decided to sit on it as I rest my eyes from excessive staring at the computer monitor. My eyes were at random times feel burning pains which causes me to get teary eyed even when I'm not really crying. At times, I can't even open my eyes, I had to shut them for a while to be soothed by the tears it produced. And I seriously think wetting it with cold water would just make it worse. I've read somewhere in the internet that what I am having are symptoms of dry eyes.

So after reading that article from Wikipedia, I've realized I am not resting my eyes at all. Hehehe. Malamang may magagalit na naman sa 'kin nito sa katigasan ng ulo ko. But I feel that reading from a printed book is already a very welcome break for my eyes. I've been spending a great deal of time in front of the computer kasi. I'm about to take a bath pa naman in a few hours because I'm headed to a church friends' wedding this afternoon. And I have to perfectly polish our records to be ready for reporting by Monday. It gets really very hard for me when my procrastinator side kicks in. I want to kill it!

About the book, I find it full of insights. As I've mentioned, I'm still halfway through it. Had I have nothing up today, I can probably finish it in one sitting, because I find it very interesting. I had gone halfway through in a matter of 2-3 hours. It kind of helped me in knowing what to do with my own God written love story. The couple who wrote it were truly blessed, and I'm praying to God I'd have the same kind of relationship with my future husband. I know God will take care of it.

I'm planning to write a review and a summary of the parts or lines in the book that had the most impact on me, or those that I was able to identify with. I do hope though that I'd be able to do it. It would be great if I'd be able to share what I learned from the book, and for me to keep a record of what I learned as well.

When someone shares something of value with you and you benefit from it, you have a moral obligation to share it with others.

~Chinese proverb

Love is Waiting

I suddenly felt a surge of emotion in my heart last night, that it was threatening to burst on me and make me spill words that I've been mostly afraid to admit to anyone whenever I start to feel it, during the course of my life. I suddenly had this longing inside me to tell what I feel, but then something inside me tells that it's not yet the right time. I changed my ym status to "I feel like my heart's gonna burst" and it immediately attracted the attention of close friends added in my ym list. Nix, being the polite girl she is, checked what's with it right away without asking too much info that might sound like she's prying on something very personal already. That's what I like about her. I told her it is indeed too personal that I think I can't share it to anyone at the moment and that the status just tells what I currently feel... I just don't feel comfy sharing it with anyone at the moment. I was praying for God's take on this and was asking Him to give me an immediate answer if possible because I was at that moment struggling of what's trying to burst my heart out.

I could've easily spilled this to that person had I not been able to hold it, thanks to Nix for being fast in asking :D. I can't give info to her, but I know the girl has a quite good intuition so I asked her what does she feel about it, and maybe we can start from there, so that I can also help myself. She then started off with checking how things are going. Then I told her I currently feel that my feelings are trying to overrule my mind. She quoted a line from the movie Fireproof: "Don't follow your heart because your heart can be deceived." Agree naman ako sa sinabi nya, and it felt like those few words made the juices in my brain flow to let me think clearly about the situation. I have to wait on God first. Patience. She also told me that God sometimes speak to her through songs and gave me two Brooke Fraser songs that I might want to check, "Faithful" and "Love is Waiting". My eyes caught the "Love is Waiting" first and searched for it in Youtube. And upon checking out the message, I can say it describes exactly what I felt I need to do.. or to say.

In the autumn on the ground,
between the traffic and the ordinary sounds
I am thinking signs and seasons while a north wind blows through
I watch as lovers pass me by
Walking stories - whos and hows and whys
Musing lazily on love, pondering you

I'll give it time, give it space and be still for a spell
When it's time to walk that way we wanna walk it well

[CHORUS:]
I'll be waiting for you baby
I'll be holding back the darkest night
Love is waiting til we're ready, til it's right
Love is waiting

It's my caution not the cold
There's no other hand that I would rather hold
The climate changes, I'm singing for the strangers about you
Don't keep time, slow the pace
Honey hold on if you can
the bets are getting surer now... that you're my man

[CHORUS]

[BRIDGE:]
I could write a million songs about the way you say my name
I could live a lifetime with you and then do it all again
and like I can't force the sun to rise or hasten summer's start,
neither should I rush my way into your heart

I was like... this is bull's eye. Shot right at the target. LoL! Ganda pa ng pagkakanta. And after listening to the song, I felt peace in my heart, and it got tamed. I chose to keep singing this song while I pray to God to let me know when would be the right time to reveal anything and how I should do it.

Love is patient. ~1 Corinthians 13:4

Overtime on a Saturday Morning

I'm currently rendering an overtime on a rest day. Half-day lang naman. Though I'm not sure if it would be appropriate for me to ask for a pay for this because during the days I am not doing what I'm supposed to do resulting into this piled up job I currently have hence the OT request, I am getting paid in full. I even get paid in full during my absences when I got sick for a whole week but I think that's just right. I was just thinking I'd be unfair to my boss if I still ask for a pay for this OT request, though he's the one who really requested it. I'm handling the company finances and it's now in really bad shape and we already lost track. So I need to catch up on this right away or else, I'd be having the same issue I had this month in processing our salaries. Our salaries have been delayed because I am not doing my job properly. Shame on me.

Makeup Went Wrong

I went to a debut of a close friend in church last Saturday, January 29, held at Vivere Hotel in Alabang. Since it's a special and kind of formal event, I needed to dress up, and that includes dressing up my face too. I am not used to having makeup in my face and when I was younger--I really didn't like putting on makeup but as I grew older, I realized this is a necessity for girls or women. I actually hated the idea of putting on makeup before but later on realized that there will be times I will not have a choice. I need to wear makeup specially during special events.

So as I was saying, I went to this debut and had to wear makeup. We were running late and so I didn't have much time to have options. I have a friend with me and the idea of spending thousand bucks on makeup for a one night event which is only a debut (buti sana kung awards night at bibigyan kami ng award at madaming paparazzi, we can probably get away with spending 1500 php--this is at Bench Fix--with just hair and makeup) so we went out to scout for a cheaper salon that will be able to do our hair and makeup right away... inside Festival Mall. Talk about not having much option while under time constraint.

We found Freshaire as the one who offers the cheapest hair and makeup in that mall, where makeup is done for only 200 pesos and hair, 400 pesos. However, we had to wait for about an hour before they do us and we no longer have much time so we headed to the next cheapest salon available--Going Straight. They do hair and makeup and hair is priced depending on the length. My friend and I have the same hair lengths, and they priced us almost Php 900 for hair and makeup.

We had our hair and makeup done there because they're able to take us in right away, sabay pa kami. It was a guy who did our hair and makeup and he's only one so while I wait for my turn 'cause he did my friend first, I went to get dressed. He made sure he did everything fast because we're running late and it took me some time to get dressed so when I went back, he's almost finished with my friend. My turn came and he did my makeup first, following the hair. Masyado yata nagmamadali si kuya, he forgot to apply foundation on my face. He did my eye makeup because that is the most challenging and complicated part of my face--or with any girl naman yata kasi it's where most of the colors go. So blend blend... with layer after layers of colors and here's what I got:


eye makup went wrong
That's me with the hair done na din. My hair almost went wrong too because initially, he did a cobra style daw tawag dun, to me it looked like I rode an open windowed jeep running at 150kph speed, with my hair not coming back to its place after. So I told him just raise my top a little and pull half of my hair back. I so didn't like everything talaga but sorry for me, I don't have a choice.

Yes--I went to the party looking like that. I just tried to carry it as much as I can but really, I was very disappointed. And we're late. I still had fun in the party. I don't want to ruin my night with that, though it made a big part in the event. The theme of the party is MTV style nga pala and I was trying to look like a korean pop star, which was an epic fail.

This is a lesson learned for me. And because of this, I've been watching makeup tutorials for asian eyes in Youtube. My eyes are a challenge because I have hooded lids--I have double lids but when my eyes open, the crease hides under, making my eyes look like I have mono lids or no lids at all. My eyes don't have definition or depth. It's very flat, like the typical asian eyes. And it's small, and chinky, and my brows are very high. Hirap makeup-an.

I saw in the tutorials that I'm going to need to use a lot of color talaga, even if I just want to create a simple look. I hope to learn to do my own makeup in the future to save me from spending a lot of money for something that will just extremely disappoint me after.